Begin Again
by Marisol Gaddi
Summary: Today was going to be the day she would allow herself to be sad for the first time.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Kaichou wa Maid-sama and its wonderful characters. Sole property belongs to Hiro Fujiwara.**

* * *

"**Begin Again"**

**by Marisol Gaddi**

* * *

"Misaki," he began. There was an eerie solemnity in his deep, familiar voice that stopped long unspoken words from flooding out her mouth.

There were a lot of times in the past eight months where Misaki would dream about this moment and in them she always had something different to say like "I miss you" or "You've got some nerve calling just now, stupid alien!" but what she said, or rather asked, wasn't something she had uttered in any of her fantasies before. Warning bells blared inside her head but she instead took a deep breath in an attempt to mask her nervousness. "What is it, Usui?" she questioned, using his family name to sound nonchalant and familiar.

There was a pause from the other line.

"Ta-Takumi?"

"Misaki, please don't wait for me anymore. I'm sorry."

* * *

Four days had passed since Misaki got that twenty seconds phone call from Takumi Usui and since then she has seen him appear on television more frequently as the business world went into an uproar at that very day, too, with the formal announcement of his takeover of the infamous Walker Corporation.

Misaki then understood immediately.

'_He _couldn't_ come back anymore.'_

Knowing the reason behind his decision to end their relationship so abruptly eased the hurt a little. Misaki had already known that a future with Usui was obscure and it grew hazier by the day especially following the events of the death of his grandfather, and the spreading of the rumor that Gerard Walker, his half-brother and the original heir to the family empire, was horribly ill. It was also alleged that he was already engaged to be married to a daughter of a business partner as a part of a merging deal that will, without a doubt, strengthen the company's standing despite the many hurdles it had to deal with.

The clock on her study table glared with the time 6:51. Her first class was about to begin in thirty-nine minutes yet Misaki dragged her blanket over her head to block the bright rays of the sun seeping through her lilac-colored window curtains.

'_I guess I can cut classes just this one time.'_ She was a university student now anyway. Many of her professors hardly cared if a student was or wasn't in class everyday as long as he was there to take the final exam before the semester ended.

Misaki, with her mind made up, sank deeper into her mattress, relishing in its softness.

Yes, today was going to be the day she would allow herself to be sad for the first time.

* * *

Misaki walked aimlessly in the bustling city. When her mother stuck her head through the opening of her bedroom door, with a concerned expression plastered on her already tired face, Misaki knew she couldn't stay in their home the whole day lest Minako and Suzuna got suspicious of her. Misaki Ayuzawa has, after all, never been the skipping type. She wasn't ready to tell them about Usui's phone call just yet. They would be devastated and take pity on her. She doubted she could handle that much emotional burden when she could barely handle hers.

She had told herself time and time again to not take things personally nor take things against Usui. They had been different; their worlds so far apart from the very beginning and the universe was just righting the status quo they had attempted to break before. This was how it was supposed to be. She only wished she could be angry but instead she was even grateful to him for going out of his way to speak to her despite the strict rule imposed on him not to. And it showed that despite the many months they've spent apart, Usui still knew her well and – dare she say it – cared for her.

'_Not that it matters now'_, she thought mournfully. If he had sent her a letter or an e-mail, she would have attempted once more to go to him in England to set things straight, to set aside the truth from the lie in spite of the reassurance that she would just fail again with that endeavor. A phone call from him left no room for doubts, for wishful thinking, and for reckless behaviors.

This was reality. They were over. There was nothing that could be done anymore.

And yet the sun still rose today like it did yesterday and the day before that. Misaki was not angry but she was, with complete dismay, sad and heartbroken – incredibly, reluctantly so – and she hadn't been able to make herself concentrate on her studies these past few days. It had cost her a lot to get to the university she wanted and a scholarship along with it, and likewise knew well that she should be working harder to prove that she truly belonged there. She had even quitted her job as a server in Maid Latte just so she could have more time to study. But alas, though possessing a demon-like temper, Misaki was still human capable of being broken. Two loves lost in less than a year has finally burned down her spirit.

Ah, yes. It was three and a half months ago when her father, Sakuya Ayuzawa, left them. _Again._ Misaki had secretly hope that her family would be complete once more; though it was difficult for her and her family to forgive him for leaving them for so long, their longing for a father had softened their hearts. But, when he was finally allowed to live with them again, he had behaved restlessly. He was gone for far too long and had no place in their home anymore. Two and a half weeks after living under their roof, he left again, leaving only a written letter of his "sincerest" apologies. Misaki had not gotten angry at that time, too. There was only the same desolate acceptance she was feeling now.

'_This is how things are meant to be.'_

* * *

Misaki halted midstride. "Y-You...!"

"Ah. It's such a surprise to see you here of all places, Miss Ayuzawa," Maki said, the surprise he claimed not evident on his always-guarded features.

'_Then _that_ person must be…!'_

"Why," Tora Igarashi began as he stepped off his signature black limousine, "if it isn't Misaki Ayuzawa! What brings you here in Maki's cafe?"

Bewildered, Misaki looked up to the shop's sign and confirmed that she was in fact in front of Maki's butler cafe. "I... wasn't aware I'd walked this far..." she said mostly to herself.

Tora's devilish smirk disappeared and he looked at her with mild astonishment. "You walked all the way _here_? From where?"

"Home."

* * *

"Is there anything else you'd like, Miss Ayuzawa?"

Misaki stared at the table overflowing with various dishes of food she knew she could not finish in one seating and thought about how ridiculous this was all. "I'm seriously _okay_," she stressed for the nth time.

Tora dismissed Maki then scoffed at her from across the table. "Your skin is pale and it was as if you were in some sort of a trance when we first saw you, Ayuzawa. In addition, you walked from your home to here, which, by bus, takes about an hour and half to get to. You are an accident about to happen. Now, eat before I force-feed you myself."

"You're not going to do that."

"You know very well how things go when you challenge me, Ayuzawa. And I swear, if I do, I will take immense pleasure in it."

"No, you wouldn't."

"Do you see anyone here who can stop me?" he said, motioning to the private section of the cafe Maki tabled them in, prompting Misaki's mind to drift to the memory of her first visit to Miyabigaoka's student council room and to what had transpired in there. She shuddered and dug into the dish nearest to her. Tora chuckled triumphantly.

"I still think this is too extravagant. I can't finish all of these," she said in between bites.

"It's your fault for not picking what you wanted."

A calm silence descended over the table as Misaki helped herself to the other dishes laid out in the vast table. Quietly, she admitted to herself that the blonde-haired man was right. She was famished and most of all foolish for walking all the way to the farthest side of the city. Her body felt weak and that was saying much for someone athletic.

* * *

Misaki rubbed her slightly swollen belly as if the action would ease the uncomfortable fullness. _'That was such a great meal...' _

Her head then snapped up upon remembering why she was even able to lavish on a scrumptious and expensive meal in the first place. Misaki found Tora staring at her with an expression she couldn't quite label but unnerved her a little nonetheless. She decided to pay no mind to it and asked, "I'm sorry for not asking earlier but aren't you going to eat, President Igarashi?"

"President?" he inquired with a slight tilt of his head.

Misaki slapped her forehead lightly with her palm. "Oh, right. You're not student council president anymore."

"Yes. I, like you, have already graduated from high school," he enunciated slowly like he was talking to someone of lower intellect.

Misaki harrumphed in irritation at his obvious teasing, and continued. "It's been so long since we've last seen each other. What are you even doing here in Japan?"

Tora shifted in his seat, discomfort setting in him at the alien feeling of being questioned. "Studying."

"Really?! I've always assumed you'd go to a university abroad. This is such a surprise."

He looked at her boringly but there was a glint in his eye Misaki couldn't interpret. There was a sudden shift in the air that her body was able to respond to before her mind could even put meaning in to it. It was all of a sudden difficult to look at him straight in the eyes.

"Plans change," he replied cryptically.

"Oh, I see... where do you go?"

"I'm taking up business administration in good ole Todai."

"I go there, too! But why haven't I seen you there? I mean, I know the campus is huge but–."

He interjected, "I was taking my classes online."

"Online? Why?"

Tora was quiet for a moment. Misaki then proceeded to apologize. "I'm sorry. Was I being too privy? I forget that we aren't even friends."

Her companion suddenly scoffed and, as if an imaginary switched was flicked, gone was the unnerving calmness of his demeanor that was, in an instant, replaced by the irritating, and guarded haughty air she'd always associated him with.

"I just got back from a business trip in London yesterday. The matter I had to take care of was too severe so I had to settle it there in person."

"London?" Misaki quickly forgot all about her thoughts regarding his unusual behavior at his utterance of the seemingly magical word. "In England?"

Her peeked interest only seemed to ire him more. "Is there any other London?" he barked sarcastically.

"Did you see Taku–?" The question suddenly died on her lips and seeing it made Tora's anger subside.

'_She knows...'_

"I," he began, "I think Maki is really appreciating having you in his cafe."

The abrupt change in topic surprised Misaki but it was, however, silently appreciated. "Oh? W-Why?"

"Don't you remember? It was you and your friends from that little maid cafe of yours that inspired him to pursue this endeavor in the first place."

The memory of the male-only footman audition debacle came to Misaki's head as clear as day. "Ah, right."

Silence.

"So... do you come here often?"

Tora chuckled at a private joke then answered, "I do when I can."

"I see."

More silence.

"You two are actually good friends, aren't you?" she genuinely mused.

"Why do you say that? I remember mentioning to you before that our relationship, just like the one's I shared with others from Miyabigaoka, is nothing more than for business' sake."

"Well, you two probably started out like that but you two evolved."

Tora clearly looked unconvinced, encouraging Misaki to continue. "It's the same with us. I used to hate you and think of you as nothing but a douche–" She ignored the look that dared her to continue her speech. "–but you're actually... kind. You're harsh, arrogant, sharp-tongued, and perverted but I've witnessed before how kind and helpful and caring you can be to people who've become important to you... in a way you could only understand though... most of the time. You did help Maki with this – and don't you use your "I did it for my own advantage" bit because I know you can create your own butler cafe or whatever, which can even be ten times better than this, so easily – and you also helped me... or rather, are helping me... Am I making sense?"

Tora was only silent causing Misaki to blush two folds upon realizing what she had just said and how she said it – so admonishingly like she was only talking to her sister or Shintani. "Forget I said anything. God, why have I been rambling?! Uhm..." she toggled her mind for something else to talk about. "Oh, yeah! People get their hair cut when they're heartbroken, right? _Shit._ That isn't any better–"

Tora's fist landed on the table, the bang barely muted by the thick covering. "_Are you crazy?_ That's stupid especially for someone like you, Misaki Ayuzawa."

Misaki rose up defensively. "It's a symbolic thing, isn't it? Other people always do that all the time! It's normal! And it helps, or so they say."

Tora looked like he was on the verge of wanting to shake some sense in to her petite frame. He instead crossed his arms across his chest and half-snarled at her, "Cutting off your past doesn't do you any good in whatever way you do it. You deal with your problems, your feelings, and everything else yourself, or else somebody else would do it for you and trust me you will rarely, if not entirely, like the results of that. It's not always okay to make a mistake. Reality cannot be undone. Reality has no refresh button or 'try again next time'. Second chances are a rarity, you know?"

Misaki sat back down, stunned and stung by his sharp words.

"I... I know that," Misaki whispered moments later. "I know that," she repeated, louder and firmer but still so quietly. "Of course, I do. I've known that since the day my father first left us, which is why I've always made it a point to always keep my guard up and my walls high and impenetrable. Then Takumi came and now he's gone – completely – and I honestly don't know what to do. Do I rebuild that wall he broke through and left gaping? Or, do I, like you said, deal with it?

Believe me when I say I want to the latter but it's so much easier said than done. So, I'm sorry for wanting to start with cutting my hair. Call me an imbecile for all I care but this is what I think will help me now, do you understand?!"

* * *

Misaki's fingers repeatedly ran slowly through the roots of her hair and down, down, down to the tips that now kissed the apex of her neck, relishing at its newness.

"Happy now?" Tora asked as he glanced at her from his spot in his limousine. She only smiled at him without looking as a reply. Tora shifted his eyes away and in to the highway, the palm supporting his face covering his slightly tinted cheeks. He cleared his throat, "By the way, didn't you have classes today?"

Misaki let out a haughty laugh fit for an Igarashi. "I cut those, too."

"Well, you're turning out to be a rebel."

Misaki dug holes at the back of his head with her eyes. "Shut up, Presi–... I just remembered. I don't even know what to call you now."

"You can call me by my given name."

"I'm not as audacious as you to do that so soon," she huffed.

He rolled his citrine eyes. "Fine. Igarashi, then."

"Better."

A full minute of silence passed before Misaki spoke again. "I-Igarashi?"

"What?"

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"You know...," she started again.

"What?"

"For someone born with a silver spoon on his mouth, you sure sound like you've actually lose something before."

Without taking his eyes off the road and the houses their vehicle passed by rapidly, he answered, "I have."

Misaki, though surprised, nodded understandingly and did not press further. She twisted her body away from his direction and settled in to her seat, welcoming and appreciating only now the stillness of the drive towards her home.

Tora followed suit. He leaned further back towards his seat, smiled and said to himself quietly, "But I think the gods are feeling generous about that rare second chance."

* * *

"_I've been spending the last eight months_

_Thinking all love ever does is break and burn and end_

_But on a Wednesday in a cafe, I watched it begin again"_

"_But on a Wednesday in a cafe, I watched it begin again"_

_Begin Again by Taylor Swift_

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**The End.**

* * *

**Authoress' Notes:**

And I am reborn! Hahaha!

I first began doing this oneshot when Begin Again was released as a single, which was on September of last year... so, wow. I just finished this now. /shot.

I don't even remember what prompted me to this. It didn't go through the usual writing process I have with everything planned out. I just winged this and I am happy about it. *pats self*

I'd like to take this opportunity to say HI to my new readers *waves excitedly* and THANK YOU to all my readers. I do receive your comments, alerts, and faves from my other fanfics and your occasional private messages, and they assure me that my stories and my writing are still being appreciated despite my absence. I'm sorry for not replying (see reason after my name below). Thank you so much nonetheless! They are much appreciated.

A lot of you are asking/threatening (haha...?) me to continue my (many) other ongoing Maid-sama fanfics, and my answer to that is... I won't make any promises anymore. I don't like disappointing you or even myself when I don't get to keep 'em. :( So, like this oneshot, I'll just wing those ones too. Surprises are good, aye? Aye!

So, again, thank you so much for always being supportive! I vehemently hope you like this Tora x Misaki ficlet of mine.

Until next time!,

Mari

(new graduate; in-coming med. student – yup. not tired of studying yet. nope.)

03-27-13


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